Why Abuse Happens


You can grasp why abuse happens to overcome the torment or remain trapped in darkness with fear. – Abuse scars a victim’s heart and oppresses the mind. Downtrodden in spirit, victims have a difficult time letting go of the story.

The story of abuse becomes a record, playing over and over again in the recesses of the mind. Victim’s recount what happened, and hold onto the pain and suffering caused by others.

Victims remain trapped in darkness long after the affliction has ended.   

When you grasp why abuse happens, you end the mental torment and start healing the deep scars. And the way you perceive your story and what you believe to be true is an essential part of that process.

My Story of Abuse

My story, soon to be a memoir, is a tale of a young girl who becomes trapped in darkness with fear.

As a child, Linda suffers from neglect, child abuse, and child sexual abuse. The ill-treatment experienced throughout childhood effects her mindset.

As a teenager, she has restricted beliefs regarding relationships, love, sexual behavior, and adult life. And this mentality affects her patterns of thinking and choices and decisions.

As a young woman, she experiences domestic violence at the hands of her husband for three and one-half years.

The abuse she suffers causes more pain and suffering. She tries her best to survive. But ultimately runs in fear for her life and loses everything including her children.

Learn More: Memoir

The Truth Sets You Free 

Linda grew up in hostile conditions and became a survivor who knew how to endure pain and suffering. She lived in a constant state of confusion and was always in fight or flight mode, and believed she had to win the conflict alone.

Linda thought she was a victim of abuse and violence. And those beliefs encompassed her mind and guided her actions for a long time.

She continued living as a victim and making poor choices and decisions in life. Until one day, the Lord sat her down on a bathroom floor and showed her the truth.

He illuminated the darkness encompassing her life.

Learn More: Walking in Darkness

She’ll never forget that day.

After twenty-plus years, Linda broke free of another unhealthy relationship. Her new apartment was very charming. The new maroon futon had arrived, and matching curtains hung in place. She was happy for the first time in a long time.

Linda M Carleton

Then disaster struck like a violent tidal wave.

Within a short time Linda; started dating, encountered an estranged abusive husband on a dating website, and became pregnant. She was devastated at the thought of raising another child at forty-six years old.

Linda didn’t have the strength to fight anymore.

She prayed the unthinkable.

“Please God, take this child from me.”  

Shortly after, Linda found herself on the bathroom floor. She could see the fetus amongst the blood. The life she prayed for God to take was in her hands.

Linda was exceedingly ashamed, and grief struck her heart like never before. 

How could she have asked God to do that for her?

How could she be so selfish?

Linda cried uncontrollably in sorrow for asking God.

Then began seeking God for the why answers.

Why Abuse Happens

God in His mercy granted His understanding of His divine truth.

God replayed the forgotten moments of a broken and afflicted childhood. He brought to mind the choices and decisions made along the way. Exposed all the secrets buried beneath the surface and not understood.

God enlightened the dark path traveled for years. He revealed the sin encompassing and affecting her life and reminded her of His rescuing grace and transforming love.

His truth set Linda free!

To grasp the truth about why abuse happens, you must have FAITH in the Lord. The Lord is the only way, truth, freedom and abundant life.

Linda was unknowingly a victim of SIN who walked in darkness. She believed the lie you can survive and overcome in your strength.

She never comprehended the truth during those years of darkness, for one can only understand the reality by the grace of God.

It’s a gift freely given, God’s gift to his loved child.

Linda spent years living in darkness and not knowing or understanding the Word of God. She sought to live life on her terms and do things her way.

Linda’s earthly and heavenly father let her. They allowed her to utilize her freedom of choice or free will.

Learn More: 3 Steps to Living the Abundant Life

Perception of the Truth

Linda didn’t have a good understanding of life as a young adult. She was naive and lacked the spiritual guidance needed for an abundant life.

The choices and decision made were not in line with God’s Word or will. They were hers to make, and the consequences were hers to endure.

You can replay the victim story and remain trapped or grasp the truth of God’s word and be set free. Linda chose to seek and understand the truth of God’s Word.

Deciding to listen to and obey the Word of God, she stopped doing things her way and began to do things God’s way. Quit walking in darkness with sin and started to walk in the light of Christ by faith.

Linda was no longer a victim of abuse. Her story had changed. By the grace of God, she became a survivor by grace and warrior of faith. 

The devil can mask sin with many lies, but the truth shall always prevail. To grasp the reality, you must be willing to seek, listen to and obey the Word of God.

Linda learned how to fall to her knees in awe of God and his rescuing grace. Today, she understands she nothing without God. 

I pray you to come to know the saving grace of God and His peace that surpasses all understanding. – For only He can alter your story and stop the record.

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L.M. Carleton

Hi! I'm Linda, an abuse survivor rescued by grace. I write to raise awareness and encourage abuse victims to grow in wisdom and restore their lives. I conquered adversity by faith and worked caring for the elderly and physically and mentally challenged for twenty-plus years.

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