How can you learn to overcome the fear of vulnerability? The best way is to do what you fear, walking by faith.
Having suffered abuse at the hands of parents, a boyfriend, a husband, or a stranger leads to being fearful and distrustful. The last thing you want to do is be vulnerable.
Vulnerability to an abuse survivor means you are open and trusting of others. It leaves you susceptible to a possible attack of abuse, criticism, and personal judgment.
Being vulnerable means openly sharing personal thoughts, feelings, struggles, and secrets. It entails trusting others without worrying about being disappointed again.
The thought of being vulnerable is out of the question for many abuse survivors. The fear of being judged harshly, let down, or hurt again is unbearable. Instead, you retreat into a shell and block the world out.
I get it!
How I Overcome the Fear of Being Vulnerable
Several years ago, I was fearful to answer my estranged abusive husband’s message on that dating website. I was apprehensive to write about personal stories of child abuse and domestic violence on a blog.
The thought of sharing my darkest secrets with the world never crossed my mind. I thought, “What if someone I know reads this stuff.” What will they think of me? What will they think of the choices I’ve made in life? How will they judge me?
You see, underneath the fear of being vulnerable is another concern: the fear of personal attack and judgment from others. Victims tend to give power and control of themselves over to others out of fear. Fear of personal attack leaves victims vulnerable in unhealthy ways.
To overcome the fear of vulnerability, do what you fear, walking by faith. You don’t have to live in fear of what others will do or think of you. Trust in the Lord and lean not on your understanding. His perfect love casts out doubt.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love. I John 4:18 KVJ
I believe the world needs more people to be vulnerable with their hearts. The world needs people to share their stories of pain and anguish. Victims need to connect with others who can help them overcome the fear of being vulnerable.
To overcome vulnerability, we must lay aside our human tendency to cast personal judgment. We need to love our neighbors as ourselves, flaws and all. This doesn’t mean you must accept sinful behavior; instead, flee from it.
God will judge in His righteousness in the end!
The world needs more compassion and empathy for the sufferings of others. For we are all born unrighteous and made righteous in Him. It is a gift of His saving grace. I pray you will accept it by faith and learn to fear not. This is the way I learned to overcome the fear of being vulnerable.
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