Last updated: June 6, 2023
Do you have a hard time overcoming emotional pain? Is it difficult for you to overcome past emotional hurts? Read this story to learn how to overcome emotional pain and move forward.
I understand the agony of letting go of past emotional hurts. Know the struggle of overcoming emotional pain. Have suffered from child abuse, neglect, and sexual abuse.
My heart also became filled with emotional distress after enduring domestic violence and losing children. After years of adversity, the emotional wall around my heart became solid.
The emotional pain and memories of a disturbed past were pushed down deep inside.
I moved forward in life, or so I thought. But twenty years later, the emotional pain and memories of an abusive past came rushing back to the surface.
Trying to forget past hurts didn’t work, and pushing the emotional pain down inside prevented my heart from healing. I became bitter and cynical, and anger filled my heart.
Struggling to be open and vulnerable in relationships. My relationships with men always ended in disaster. I tried dating, but men know when a woman’s heart is not open to love.
To convey his thought, one guy sent the URL address to the music video “Come from the Heart” by Kathy Mattea. Halfway through, I stopped the video and burst into tears.
Come from the Heart
He could tell the emotional walls were extremely high that my heart was closed to love.
I cried, “I don’t know how to let go!”
How do you let go and move forward in life?
How do you love as you will never get hurt?
I always pick the wrong type of guy and end up getting hurt over and over again.
I did dance like nobody was watching!
I’ve learned great relationships are built with mutual trust and respect.
But still didn’t know how to open your heart to love.
How do you open your heart to love again?
One line in the song struck a chord within me.
You needed to learn to let go!
Step 1 – Acknowledge Past Hurts
The first step is to acknowledge the past hurts.
You can’t heal what you don’t first acknowledge.
Kathy states best, “You’re going to have to learn to let go.”
You’ll have to learn to let go of the emotional pain associated with past hurts. I found writing to be very beneficial in the healing process. It’s helped me to acknowledge the past hurts and heal emotional pain.
Writing or journaling allows you to work through emotional feelings healthily and helps you learn to let go. Writing helps release painful memories and unwelcome thoughts, and emotional pain.
Step 2 – Forgiveness
The second step is learning to forgive yourself and others.
Past hurts will continue to affect your mind and bring your spirit down low.
Learning to let go requires forgiveness for you, poor choices, and past mistakes. It involves forgiveness for others wrong doings too. Forgiveness frees your mind from painful memories and lifts your spirits to a better place.
I built up bitterness towards others who hurt me. It prevented me from dealing with issues. Focusing on rage helped me forget about the pain inside. I used anger as a coping and defense mechanism.
These are ineffective ways of dealing with emotional pain and past hurts. Since then, I’ve forgiven others for past damages and wrongdoings. Forgiveness allowed me to move forward in the healing process.
Step 3 – Let Your Light Shine
So now we go back to our second question.
How do you open your heart to love again?
To find the answer, listen to “Let Your Light Shine” by Keb’ Mo’.
Let Your Light Shine
To open your heart to love again, you need to “let your light shine” and “let your love show” where ever you go.
What will you do? “Let the world go by in a corner all alone?”
This song is a reminder to keep letting your light shine. It reminds me not to sit in a corner all alone. It reminds me to step into the greatness God has created in me and not to be afraid to love again.
It’s a reminder to let your love show for all to see the glory of God.
Then when the rains and the winds blow, your love will shine bright. When everything is falling apart, you can still give love from a healed heart.
This is fantastic, Linda! Wow, you really know how to pour yourself into your writing! God has blessed you tremendously in that. This post really helped me. My past suffering was nothing like what you’ve been through, but your blog is certainly helpful to many situations. I was bullied repeatedly during my school years. Not physically. But I was tormented with verbal assaults to the point where I wanted to die. It was emotional and psychological torture for years. They made fun of me for having a big nose, which was shaped funny as well. Then, of course, they moved into other areas of malicious assault on my person. Only God’s grace has brought me to a place of healing and forgiveness. I am so sorry for what you’ve been through, Linda. But God is using your pain to further His Kingdom. I just said a prayer for you, dear sister. ?
Hi, Jamie! Thank you for reading and the kind words of encouragement. Also for the prayers. I’m grateful this post helped you. It’s sad you had to endure being tormented as a young adult. Young people don’t understand the real damage being done to a person during such torment. It takes the grace of God to heal such afflictions. It’s awesome to know you found His healing and forgiveness for others. God Bless Linda